Sample copy
(Opening Spread)
This little book is most respectfully submitted to members of The Ardbeg Committee and is dedicated to the original founders of the Distillery.
It is intended that the information contained therein shall facilitate the advancement of knowledge with regard to Ardbeg Single Islay Malt Whisky in the expectant hope that the Distillery shall remain open and prosperous from this day on (i.e. please drink Ardbeg).
Distillery Manager and Committee Chairman
Founded on the First Day of the First Month in the Year Two Thousand AD.
(Copy extract from next spread - Rules & Regulations)
5. Responsibilities of membership are primarily to enhance the member's own quality of life through greater understanding and comprehension of The Ultimate Islay Malt Whisky.
6. Moreover, members are expected to actively pursue a serious and altruistic duty: to bring others into the Ardbeg fold. The result of the collective effect of this is to increase worldwide consumption, thereby ensuring that the doors of Ardbeg Distillery shall never close again.
Section 3
Tactics to help achieve the aim set out in Section 2 Paragraph 6 above:
7. Join any society, association, club (sports or otherwise), charitable organisation, body, amalgamate, institution, establishment or committee, formed for the purposes of alcoholic enjoyment or otherwise and form new friendships throughout the community.
8. Do all lawful things deemed as necessary to gain the attention of the person within your company identified as someone unaware of the delights of Ardbeg.
9. Once attention is gained, prepare the individual to have a dram of Ardbeg placed in their hand. Select from the vicinity either Ardbeg 10 Years Old, 17 Years Old or another Ardbeg Vintage, depending on your available budget and personal inclination.
10. You will find it advantageous to refer to the Notes of the Chief Noser contained on pp12-16, to fully inform the individual concerned of the experience that they are about to enjoy. After this, silence may be best observed, so that every one of the senses may be focused on the malt. After all, tasting is more properly termed 'sensory evaluation'.
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